Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
