:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I look excited, but its just a facade.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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