She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize