belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize