I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
