Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
