Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
This baby is an asshole
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
