Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm at about main and main street
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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