so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize