he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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