you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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