so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
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