he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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