The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
your like the ambassador to my penis.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
