It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I smell stomach acid.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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