you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
