Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize