32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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