i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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