I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
so let's talk penis.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
