the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
