The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize