Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
There's always time for handjobs
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
