I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
