Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
