I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
