Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
