Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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