What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
