Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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