can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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