champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
