I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
