Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
