ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize