in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
