I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Randomize
