Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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