why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Randomize
