Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
