Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
