ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
