why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
