Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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