Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
