I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize