Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
