Plan B is the new Plan A
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
