Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
