Jerry, you need to find god
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
